Friday 27 July 2012

Entry 4

Ahoy Me Harrrrties
Where shall I begin. We were on clear crystal waters not long ago, the sky was blue and as sturdy as my wooden peg. The lads were getting lazy again, sunbaking but that was okay, because they were all in check. Then out of no where Emotions up on the callers post cried 'Hail Hail...Cyclone Ahead'. The ship and all me mates were flung wildly without much notice, mostly not understanding what was going on. Panic rushed, we had one of these last year. Blood rushed, I hope its not annual. Fear sank and so did the anchor. Down Down Down. Down to the depths of the deep blue sea. That is our No Man's Land.
But shhh. Can you hear? Look to quick and you may think its over but by Jove! It is just the eye of the storm. The calm, the deceit...the opening of vulnerability for some foreign pirates to take over and so they did!. We were anchored, no where to move or run and a part of the crew did not want to be the one to move that anchor, it may just be a little comfortable, staying in the same deep way.
Foreigners jumped the already wrecked ship. The foreigner Fatigue took Motivation and Care. They were going off to travel to the land of Numb. Yet on the ship, we were flabberghasted, shocked. How could it have happened all over again? Emotion was out of his wits! It has been years since he had added to the salty water of the deep blue.
I guess that is what happens when you don't hassle your crew! You don't keep on your toes!...or Peg.
It will be a long and strenuous time rebuilding, all of the splinters and waterlogged areas. Buffering and Polishing. Making it good as new, stronger for the next time...hopefully there is no next time. In the mean time we are on the voyage to the land of Numb to retrieve Motivation and Care back in our arms.
'Hail Hail...Ship Ahoy Ship Ahoy'...what will we make of this? Another ship?

It all started with do you remember

Wednesday 4 July 2012

Whose line is it anyway?

Lines...we all use them. We'd be lying if we said we didn't. But what makes them alright and not would be what we are trying to infer by saying them.
We use them to save our ass when we are in a tricky situation, the last time somebody asks you something and you just want to get out of the situation without hurting their feelings...you use a line. We use them to make somebody feel better...many of us claim that we are honest but when it comes to the crunch could you really look in someones eyes and tell them something that may very well crush them inside and obliterate all hope. You say 'It will get better'...'Just have faith'...'It is alright'...'It will sort itself out'. Anyone done that? Of course you have. We do it because we care, because deep down we don't want to be the one that brings down the black curtain over their eyes, the one that makes them cry because selfishly that doesn't feel good.
We use lines to make somebody's day, to just see a smile on their dile and to know that you were the purpose, the one to make that happen. It may not be entirely true but to make someone smile is one of the best feelings in the world.
Sure these may all be a little selfish for us, to make us feel like good people..but is it the right thing to do? Depending who you ask....if you ask those who use lines to manipulate people to give them what they want and desire, who are focused on one thing, to make that person feel so special when in reality it is the fifth time they have said it to another female then the above is nothing to them. If you use lines to make someone feel better and only use those sort of lines then you may feel it is not right at all, sure at the time it seems like a good idea, but is it such a good idea when they find out the truth...that the person they trusted the most to get  the truth out of lied to them...it is a lie. Maybe its what you call a white lie but a lie all the same.
I mean now I think about it...how many lines have been used on me...and what were they for...?
We will never know.
The only people you hope that do not use lines on you are your closest friends or best friend, whichever you prefer...Because to be frank that would just suck. Those are the people you trust to be honest with you no matter what, yet they tell you 'Nataleigh it was a line' when talking about someone else....if it so easy for them to do that...how could I trust I don't get the same treatment. Yet it goes back to trust....and if you've been a follower of my blog, you can tell i have issues with that concept and that only recently I have been able to trust a certain few, enough to tell them my secrets, to let them know on what i think of them or the world...but I have my days where i trust them and days where I don't...or lack that trust. I don't know if other people feel the same. It just depends on what has happened during the day or my mood, which for you people that don't know me can be temperamental at times.
Sooooo...whats in a best friend...?
I guess if you find the right person it could be good...if you find someone that is not clingy it could be marvellous, someone you could share most of your secrets to, act foolish around, and insult without feeling shame or guilt because they know that at the end of the day they will have my back as I would have theirs...when I care about someone, I care about them and not much can change that. Loyalty lies deep within me so my best friend would have to be pretty loyal, yet if I were in the wrong, tell me I'm in the wrong even if I don't want to hear it. My best friend would need to not be shy of phone calls, texting is so difficult and tiresome sometimes. A good phone call is always good. You may not be talking the whole day like texting, but a couple of hours of actual laughter rather than 'lmao, lol, and hahahaha' makes you feel better as it is genuine and not just used as a fill in. My best friend would definitely need to know when I'm being sarcastic and genuine...usually im sarcastic a lot, and if they get annoyed at that, well too bad for them. Its my thing, I adopted it a few years ago and its stuck...and they can't take it personally. Because thats just stupid. and Trust. I don't even know how I got talking about this...in the past I had a couple of best friends...but went on to be a lone ranger, its just way easier...now I have no idea if I'm floating and have close friends or what...but if I do have a rather closer friend Id rather not label it, there is no need for that superficiality. I'd rather it go unsaid. I've never really needed a best friend...well thats what I think, others see differently...but I guess it would be nice for a change. I wouldn't know. I'm just rambling now.

It all started with do you remember...